One interesting characteristic about desperation is, often when you are in the thick of it you don’t realize it. Now let me be clear… facing a challenge, having things not go your way, or not knowing the next step you should take—is NOT desperation. Desperation is a place that… well, smells. Meaning it’s recognizable a mile away. I think one of best examples of how others can smell desperation, when you can’t, is in relationships. Let me give a couple of examples, and for this blog I am going to borrow the line from Jeff Foxworthy… “You might be a redneck.”
If you are so lonely that you would happily drag someone to the movies who is deaf and blind… “You might be desperate.”
If you are 35 and hanging out at the retirement home on Friday night’s disco dance party… “You might be desperate.” (However, you also might be wealthy in a couple years.)
If you are 65 and hanging out in the high school parking lot asking if anyone needs a ride home… “You might be desperate.” (But, you also might be a pedophile.)
The point is, when you make decisions from desperation, they typically do not have a good outcome. When you are at a place where you need a quick external fix for something that is internally broken, that IS what defines desperation.
In my conversation today on The Game Changer Podcast, with Nicole Holland, we talk about what it feels like to be in this place, and what it takes to get out of it. I would love to hear from you whether you currently feel desperate, or have a story you would like to share about how you got out of what felt like a bottomless pit. Your story just may be the one that helps someone climb out.
With loving gratitude,
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